Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Randomize
