Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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