yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
