he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I didn't notice because vodka
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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