My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
