the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
