do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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