why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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