there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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