Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize