I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i used baking grease as lip gloss
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
