Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
