dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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