so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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