there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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