so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
