Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
