every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
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