I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
