I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize