yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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