Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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