found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
