Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
