Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just gargled with NyQuil
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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