i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Im part way to drunk.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
