So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I think people are normalizing furries
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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