ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
