Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Ladies don't puke and tell
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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