Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
