Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
He told me they were just razor bumps!
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
