The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
