Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
