At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
