He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
My vagina just recognized that song.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
