Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
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