so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
