i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
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