Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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