did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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