Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
