did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
