somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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