He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize