drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize