if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
