they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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