ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
