Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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