Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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