So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize