hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
