Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
