My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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